aQ·uee·nom·ics

A Blog Title is Born

2011-05-16T18:28:00.000-07:00

After that crazy night when I posted topics haphazardly and arrived at a simple and cheesy blog title, I finally took some time today to put together a coherent theme. Now it feels better. =) Enough work for a Monday!

I do realize that I have yet to really post something economics related, but the day will come when I feel like I'm in a better place to make a more informed post. Til then - life!

My Thoughts on Wesley Yang's Article in New York Magazine: Paper Tigers

2011-05-14T03:31:00.000-07:00

As much as I hate disclosing my ethnicity on my "secret public journal", and if it hasn't already been made obvious by previous posts, I think it's a pretty important topic not to pass up . I recently had a chance to read this particular article by Westley Yang. Paper Tigers. It's quite an article - just because it was like reading the anthem of my life. None of it's new, but I think this is the first time I've seen something like this go so mainstream. I get a subscription to New York Magazine, and, well fortunately despite the fact that my subscription actually just ended, my bf happened to subscribe as well (yes we finally stopped getting two copies of the same issue only recently).

You can go read the article if you want. I know some of the stuff might easily be overlooked and brushed off especially if it doesn't pertain to you. But to me it's a serious life-shaping experience that plagues me til this very day! All the struggles and choices and thoughts are all things I go through despite it being written by a male Asian writer, and the article relays the many struggles of an Asian male in the dating scene. Asian women struggle too, but I think women generally have a gender struggle on their own in the work place and society that the Asian women's struggle probably isn't as apparent yet to the mainstream. (I know that's probably a gross generalization, but that is my opinion until I'm convinced otherwise). Yang does make a mention to Amy Chua and shed a light on her that made me feel sorry for her for the first time. I've seen a few interviews of her talking about her actual research work (not interviews for her notorious book). From those interviews I felt her work has been very interesting, and I'd love to strive to be just as ambitious and learned as she. But I also realize that the reason why I value and prefer to go into research academia much has to do with my upbringing, and subsequently my options.

Really - if I could do anything I wanted? Besides winning the lottery and doing anything I want? I can no longer tell what I'm inherently passionate about and what I'm passionate as the result of being limited in my options? Does it matter? I don't know.

Most of my Asian friends can relate and agree with this article. I don't think it's something you can disagree with much. It is a reality. Bird of a feather - so I guess if you are one, you easily associate with one, and easily accept one. I think I'm surrounded by people facing this exact struggle.

It really is a topic I could go on and on about, but I draw a few conclusions/observations from this article that I always keep in mind:
1. How lucky I am to be an Asian female and in my most humble opinion attractive enough to not worry too much.
2. I do feel my parents raised me like I were a boy, however, and despite my hormones and very female reactions to things like stationary and cute furry animals, I think I have a very male brain.
3. Being introverted and naturally shy on top of all of this is NOT helpful.
4. My parents were also EXTREMELY over protective.

I'm A STEREOTYPICAL NIGHTMARE!

All in all, Amy Chua may have tackled raising children from a Tiger mom's perspective, but Wesley Yang covered what it's like to be raised in such a way. Sometimes it does scare me that I personally think Chua's method could work well with a few alterations here and there if done properly (and I do realize "done properly" is a very subjective thing, but I think my take on it is pretty Western...compared to my parents...).

And at the end of the day with all my run on sentences, it is what it is and awareness is the first step to making it better for the later generations. I'm very proud that so many kids are so self-aware so early on. Life is still good if you manage to accept your circumstances and make the best and most of it.

My alternate ending: At the end of the day, Asian food is so damn good. =P

The Blog Post That Touches On Way Too Many Subjects

2011-04-26T20:56:00.000-07:00

So - it's been awhile since I put in an entry. There are just so many things that I want to talk about and delve into detail but I'm always jumping from one interest to the next, nothing gets completed. This is pretty representative of my overall way of being - unfortunate - but creativity abound. A tangible deliverable result can happen if I really force myself to. But that will not be the point of this post. I will try not to do this again in the future - but I feel like this post should be spent catching up on all the thoughts I've been having for the past couple of weeks that I just want to capture before I forget.

Next topic! So it's been three weeks into a new post I'm trying. By post, I mean job. It's been interesting so far, lots of learning but nothing upon-which to build a career. It's a brief money-making plan I have for myself that is the least stressful with the most income. And so that's how I arrived at that. I think my time these days are better spent recharging for a year of brutal classes/thesis writing so I can take in as much of the world at my leisure as I possibly can, get some outside reading done, and brush up on the required skills I will need once I'm back in school.

So first week of this sanity-equilibrium job I found was interesting. Should I say it? Everyone I work with is Eastern European. All the people doing the work are Asian. It's so obvious it's laughable and embarrassing. Second week I find out the other colleague can't pull his weight, and I spent all my time cleaning up things that really isn't my responsibility. Third week (this week) will probably be another interesting one. We met our executive director. I think I may have met the smartest most brilliantly well rounded skilled charismatic and interesting person I have met in the history of my life. I was literally BLOWN away by how intelligent he was. Smarts, but he also knew how to talk to people. I don't think I will ever forget this meeting - however brief. It may be the last time we see him as he's busy with other stuff. I consider myself lucky to have been graced by such a presence haha. It really puts me in my place - and it is moments like this that made my decision to leave my old post a smart choice.

I also think I need to start paying more attention to Krugman. He's been making a lot of noise in the realm of economic policy in the states. I think I'm still a very green and learning economist, so I naturally gravitate towards the non-Econ stuff he posts on his blog. One was of him raving about Arcade Fire's Haiti performance. Mr Krugman and I have very different musical tastes. Does this spell doom for my econ career?

I spent the latter part of the evening watching Lady Gaga videos. My taste in music is fairly one-dimensional. I really just need 3 elements: a catchy tune, an awesome choreographed dance routine and an amazing voice. The voice doesn't even have to be amazing - but I find that I am very particular about voices when it comes to music. If I were given a chance to post a performance of a musician - I'd probably post something by Jason Mraz or Miss-A (a kpop group). I don't think I have bad taste in music - I think I just haven't developed an appreciation for music akin to Mr Krugman and the population that generally prefers sound/instrumental merit. I'm a POP fan, and I think I always will be. But kpop is the only industry that I allow myself the bubblegum kind.

The other pivotal thing I have been mulling over in my head this past week is the realm of personality traits. I found out I'm an INTP. Personal reveal!!!! I started reading everything about it - and it describes every aspect of my personality. I feel like my whole life's worth of experiences can be described to be attributed to these four traits. It's kind of earth shattering for me. I feel special, but I don't feel special. I feel restricted, but I feel empowered. I feel figured-out, but I feel boundless. It's a lot of strange and contradicting feelings that is still working itself out inside my head. I've really been misunderstood my whole life, and I know sometimes it's also what I want. I have very solid beliefs - but I find that they change frequently as I amass new information. Point of all of this is - and it ties back to what The Smartest Guy I've Ever Met said - "you are nothing special". Yes! He said that to a group of us. It's amazing. I LOVE hearing it. I may be all these things that I am, but lots of other people match it and do better and do more. I don't like not being special - but I certainly love to hear a honest statement. This honesty was what was missing at my last company - and I feel at peace again at this new place.

Lastly - I'll cover one more thing before I'm off to bed. He's right. I'm not special at all. I used to think I have a unique way of reasoning - because I'm me! I figure things out and think about things no one else thinks about. I used to think that I'm making strides no one has ever tread before. Then I found out my personality type - and my life has been so far very consistent with this personality type. And it is something that I most certainly inherited from my parents (my dad mostly I think). And if that is the case, then it is through genetics that I inherited this CRAZY brain of mine (though that's all relative), and that my thoughts and my preferences and my interests are purely the result of genetics. It's not that I CHOSE my religion, or my field of study, or things I like or don't like. It's more like I was genetically coded to can't HELP choosing the things I choose.

That's not fair??? I wish they were my decision making - not my genetic code telling me what decisions to make? My thoughts should be separate from my genetics!?? Right? Please?

Which makes a certain song repeat in my head as it is the song I've been listening to all evening.

Lady Gaga - Born This Way
"my mama told when I was young, you were all born superstars...she rolled my hair and put my lipstick on, in the glass of her boudoir..."

don't be a drag, just be a queen!

That's what I will be. A Queen. Queen of Economics?

Queenomics - cheesy but I need a blog title. Queenomics it is.

Hamster Twister

2011-04-12T19:49:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I posted, and I thought it's due time for me to get one last in before I start getting busy again during the days. I was particularly bored and felt the need to do something with the glitter pens I got from JetPens. In case you've never heard of them, they are this great online shop for Japanese stationary and writing utensils and such. I'm so happy to have discovered them.

I haven't much prepared for this post so I will just introduce my teddy bear hamster, Hamuel L Jackson to the public looking confused on my glitter pen creation. I'm calling it Hamster Twister because he really looks like he's playing twister on it!

Hammie was a present from the boyfriend for my birthday this year =)

And last, I tried this watermelon popsicle at Whole Foods today. I figured it'd be a little sweeter and more artificially flavored, but nope. It tastes like REAL watermelon. And as I worked my way through this, I noticed there were these little white seeds inside. Blegh. I don't know about you, but for me watermelon is much more enjoyable when it's the actual fruit. Everytime I've had any kind of watermelon flavored food that claimed to be "natural" always tasted strange to me even though I LOVE watermelon.

Here's a picture of the box if you ever want to decide for yourself:

My Review of Sun Tzu The Art of War

2011-04-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

Is it tacky to lead with a picture?

Recently I was reminded of a book that I bought a long time ago that I've always meant to read but just never got to. A lot of college friends have read it. Most of them were men. I don't think I personally know of any woman who have read it. If they did I wonder if it's by necessity for class (MBA programs) or maybe they're actually in the military or something. I dug around all the piles of books that I have with me, and I finally found my copy of Sun Tzu The Art of War. It's the version that was translated by Samuel B. Griffith. I found out the different translations push the readers in certain interpretation directions. I'm aware that this version is translated slightly more geared for business readers, and the author leaves more room for interpretation.I'm no literary expert. All I know is, for my purposes, this version is good enough.

This isn't so much a review, but more just my takeaways and reaction to the text. Before I start, I want to say that I did read a handful of reviews on amazon. First a couple of the really bad 1-star reviews, and then a couple of the 5-star reviews. I'm guessing most of the people who wrote the 1-star reviews are probably kids, and/or people who haven't had extensive business world experience and read the book for the wrong reasons and from a point in their lives where they have too little to draw from, and relate. I'd say that I picked a really good time to read this book, but I wish I had read this a year ago. Other than that, I know that this book would have been completely meaningless to me 5 years ago when I picked it up. Now that I have a good 5 years of work experience under my belt, and have been keeping up with the latest episodes of Mad Men, I find it extremely relevant. I'm sure if I picked this book up again in a few more years, I'd find even more relevance of the text.

I think what I will do is copy down some quotes from the book that I think summarizes the meaningful things to me nicely. Everything you see below in quotes are pulled straight from the text and I take no credit for them:

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

'The Supreme Art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting'

1. moral influence
2. weather
3. terrain
4. command
5. doctrine

'all warfare is based on deception'

'what is of the greatest importance in war is extraordinary speed'

'to subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill'

'your aim must be to take all-under-heaven intact. thus your troops are not worn out and your gains will be complete. this is the art of offensive strategy'

'if one ignorant of military matters is sent to participate in the administration of the army, then in every movement there will be disagreement and mutual frustration, and the entire army will be hamstrung.'

'a victory gained before the situation has crystallized is one the common man does not comprehend. thus it's author gains no reputation for sagacity. before he has bloodied his blade the enemy state has already submitted'

'the Tao is the way of humanity and justice. laws are regulations and institutions. those who excel at war first cultivate their own humanity and justice and maintain their laws and institutions.'

'one who sets his entire army in motion to chase an advantage will not attain it'

'do not gobble proffered baits'

'the general must rely on his ability to control the situation to his advantage as opportunity dictates. he is not bound by established procedures.'

'five qualities that are dangerous'
1. reckless
2. cowardly
3. quick-tempered
4. too delicate sense of honour
5. compassionate

'know the enemy, know yourself; your victory will never be endangered. know the ground, know the weather; your victory will then be total.'

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After reading through Sun Tzu's text, I realize that there really are excellent and solid strategic advice to any project manager. I have been doing a lot of project management work, and it has been an extremely valuable learning experience for me. It really pulled me in all directions in terms of strategic communications, how to mitigate risks, thinking creatively and outside the box, executing on speed, knowing what levers I had to work with, and making dynamic decisions aligned to business strategy.

All in all, I can say that reading this book doesn't miraculously turn you into a sagacious leader of business teams, or a courageous and prudent military general. It does however shed light on my experiences, and made me more aware and conscientious of the tactics that have a proven track of success/victory.

One thing that I feel the book doesn't cover is the concept of "managing expectations". Should there be a followup to this book for the people who are not generals to read? The generals know what to do now, but the foot soldiers like myself are lost.

Other things that I didn't cover in my above quoted text include some further readings in espionage, different types of grounds, the necessity of leaders to induce fear in order to gain respect and setting things on fire. I know that was a a bit of a general summary. But as you can tell from my summaries that I left out most of the tactical stuff, I'm not one to fight wars.

My final takeaway from the book. I don't have what it takes to be a general who can lead men and win wars. I can practice these tactics, and be aware of them when thrown into a war, but I hate the practice of deceit, and the act of espionage. I know they seem sound in the grand scheme of things, but I cannot. War really isn't for everyone.

My New Lenovo X201

2011-03-29T19:42:00.000-07:00

I still have yet to hear back from one more program I applied to for graduate school, but I think I have decided regardless of their response. Off to London I will go, and I'm starting to prepare for it all. I started looking for a data crunching machine that would be good for pretty much everything including data crunching, building professoinal presentations, writing papers, taking notes in class, etc. Most importantly, I wanted a PC. I wanted something lightweight but sturdy. Something more serious and down to business than my MacBook (which I love, still). I decided on a Lenovo X201.

I placed the order March 9th and didn't receive the laptop until March 29th. Yes, it took Lenovo 20 days to get my order to me. What's up with that? However, that's really been my only complaint.

The laptop is gorgeous. The keyboard is still a full keyboard despite it's shrunken netbook-sized screen of 12.1 inches. A few things that sets this laptop apart from a netbook? It's got excellent performance, an actual trackpad, plus the keyboard is spill proof. The latter is so vital for me; as I was typing this out I spilled some wine on the laptop =P. I'm a complete clutz and hence why Lenovos are totally made to handle all the things that will happen to it under my ownership. Yipeee! They are hardy, durable, and great for lugging around everywhere, and thus will be perfect for me to carry to class everyday.

Here are some pictures from today as I eagerly opened this package.

Below are a few specs on the laptop I customized:

Processor Intel Core i5-560M Processor (2.66GHz, 3MB L3, 1066MHz FSB)
Operating system Genuine Windows 7 Professional 64
Display type 12.1" WXGA (1280x800) LED Panel, 2x2 UltraConnect II
antenna; with Camera and Wireless Broadband Upgradeable
Total memory 84 GB PC3-8500 DDR3 SDRAM 1067MHz SODIMM Memory (2 DIMM)
Hard Drive 320 GB Hard Disk Drive, 7200rpm
DVD Recordable 8x Max Dual Layer, Ultrabay
McAfee Internet Security 2011 - 15 months

The docking station has the extra DVD player I had to add. I got all of the above for half the listing price after I used my student advantage discount on top of the special offer on Lenovo's website. This might be an older model. My 5 years in corporate America has made me a fast and steady Lenovo ThinkPad fan, and I can't imagine doing any serious work on a different computer brand.

To my X201: I look forward to many glorious years ahead with you. =)

Resurfacing my Vanity with a Vinyl Sticker Roll

2011-03-26T16:11:00.000-07:00

A few years ago I decided it was time to buy myself a vanity desk to store all my makeup, skincare and various other misc things that comes with being a girl. It's the only piece of furniture that I have kept through my move this past year and has been very useful as storage of any "inventory" that doesn't fit in the tiny manhattan apartment bathrooms. The only thing I regret is not getting something that's a little more modern and made of a different material than wood. Yes I bought a wood vanity - and the signs of wear is already starting to show.

I decided that the best way to salvage this situation is to resurface the top that has been damaged by the stuff that's leaked out of my cosmetic bottles. So a couple of things happened as a result of that. The paint would come off when I wiped off nail polish remover that might have accidentally ended up on the surface. Then certain spots wouldn't come off when I tried to wipe it because it was oily, so I'd put a cotton pad over it to cover it up until it dried. But the cotton pad would end up getting stuck to the surface. When I pulled it off, it left behind a thin layer of cotton. Then there are other things that I'd leave on top of it like my necklace holder, and when I moved the base, a ring of paint would come off with it. I don't remember this vanity being so cheap! I guess I just haven't been taking good care of it like I should.

Needless to say - the surface of this piece of furniture has become so gross and ugly and just unusable and I avoided it at all costs.

I've been playing around with a couple of ideas lately and decided on the easiest but cleanest looking solution would be to get a surface that I could just lay over the old surface. I know if I really wanted to do it right, I'd sand the surface down and reapply a layer of paint but that is just WAY too much work, including haveing to take everything out of the drawers, move it outside and get all the equipment and supplies I would need. Given how the weather's been extremely cold lately, this project would have had to wait a few more weeks. (Although, fortunately we have a balcony so we could move it out there. But so many stairs and things to carry it over).

That said, I ended up buying a vinyl sticker roll from the eBay seller premiumgraphicx-apt. For around $19 USD I figured out a quick and relatively easy solution to a less ugly vanity desk surface.

Let me warn you that I learned no techniques and I probably did everything wrong possible. I ended up with a ton of air bubbles and weirdly shaped pieces here and there. BUT - in the end I think this is a good temporary solution for a piece of furniture I just want to get to a point that it's usable and am not even sure about keeping in the next couple of years.

Here's the ugly mess before the project.

Here's what the vinyl roll looks like. You can get it in different colors, and so I just bought the black one.

Here is the finished result! Not bad.

And I decided to do my nails afterward. In the spirit of the elusive spring that's right around the corner, I used Pink Glove by Essie and a Coffret D'or Jewelight in a sheer coral pink with glitter.

Last but not least - the boyfriend found out about the blog and requested I mention our celebrity sighting today as we were making our way to Union Square. Trey Anastasio of Phish was walking around looking lost. Is he a good looking man? I didn't think so in person because he looked particularly disheveled, but this is a nice picture of him.

However, I standby my statement that musicians are always more attractive than actors!

A New Direction and Ramune

2011-03-23T14:12:00.000-07:00

So after much hiatus from this blog, I have come back! I was actively applying to grad school and fully anxious about the results that it started to become a place I come to to do most of my griping, for the length of two entries. I have since then been accepted by the programs I wanted to attend and ready to embark on my new journey academically/career-wise. But really, who wants to read about that? I'll continue to make updates on that front occasionally, but I don't want to keep this blog exclusively about that. Now that I've had some down time to watch tv, read, hang out with my friends, family, pets and do all that other good stuff, I'm ready to try something new that I can imagine myself posting about more often: all the things that I love and/or love to think about.

RAMUNE
So there's a really awesome Japanese made soda drink that I really like called Ramune. It comes in all kinds of flavors. I bought one the other day in the original flavor, which is this lemon-like flavor. Essentially it's like sprite, but fainter and not as sweet and tastes less natural, but oh-so-fun to drink! The best part, and often the hardest part about going about drinking this soda in a glass bottle is the marble that you have to dislodge from the cap to open the drink. I nearly bruised my fingers trying to get this to work.

The result? A delicious and fun soda with a glass marble that jiggles around as you take swigs. The other fun thing about this is 'Ramune' is apparently the Japanese pronounciation of 'Lemonade'. I see it. Hopefully that'll help you prounce this awesome soda, cuz I know up until now you've been calling it rah-myooon.

Here's a picture of an opened and soon to be guzzled Ramune original.
Cheers!!!

Letters of Recommendation from a Professor?

2010-07-28T11:12:00.000-07:00

Are you nuts? It's been over 5 years since I graduated undergrad. Who's going to remember me? That quiet sensitive thoughtful girl that probably tried to sit as far back as she possibly can so she can internalize all that taught information without having to make eye contact with the professor from the front row for fear of being called on?

(mental note to self - in graduate school i'm going to fight for front or second row seats and bring a tape recorder. my tired note taking hands are, tired.)

I don't want to speak for everyone, so I'll just say that I'm sure there are others out there like myself who find themselves in this particular pickle. Not only do I need a professor to write me a letter of recomendation, I'm going to need to find a professor who might be able to write me a good and relevant one for the degree that I have chosen to pursue in my graduate studies that has nothing to do with my undergrad major. They really should have written a - How to get a recommendation letter from a professor who has forgotten you For Dummies - book!

So while that book doesn't exist yet, I'll write a few paragraphs on how I'm going to go about it and potentially followup soon enough about the outcome of that in a few months.

So I slightly exaggerated that my undergraduate degree has nothing to do with what I want to do in my graduate studies. While they may be at best tangential in that they are both built upon very similar set of skills that can help me "succeed", and that I may be counting on the empathy from the admissions counsel at the schools I want to go to a little too much to "read into" this transition of skills, I do see a light at the end of this tunnel. Why? Because I've decided that instead of going for a "big name" or a more "relevant" subject professor to pursue, I'm just going to do it the honest way. I'm going to ask a professor I had my senior year (since that's the last year I was at school and the highest chance of someone remembering me. of course this might not be true for someone else, but I know it will be true for me), I'm going to ask a professor for whose class I did well in, and was highly engaged in, and was applicable to my major at the time. This was the class that made the most sense to me, and I saw had the most practical career benefits to me, and is actually ultimately what I ended up doing more or less for the past few years. I'm going to explain this WHOLE process to her, and how this career has brought me into my current interest in the subject of my graduate studies, and hope that all of it will make sense to her and resonate with her in such a way as to convince her to lend a helping hand in writing a solid if not superb letter for me. if that doesn't get me into school, then nothing will. nor will i accept it any other way, i suppose.

I know the fault is on me for not staying in touch with my professors - but I really never thought i'd be back in graduate school after working, and I was never the type to keep in touch with a big circle of people. Tough luck, bad choices, and I find it hard to change. If this blog eventually turns into "How I failed to get into Graduate school" at least I know that this will show people a list of things NOT to do.

,

A New Beginning

2010-07-26T16:32:00.000-07:00

This will serve as a place for me to vent and to express myself. I can only hope that there are others out there who might find this entertaining at the very least, and not so much a waste of time. Mostly I'm just bored and it's a much welcomed break from all the other typing I probably will have to do.

The only disclaimer I can add to my blog is that my grammar will be imperfect, my thoughts will be incomplete, my humor will be off, and my ideas will be unoriginal. However, I can guarantee that I write from the heart with open honesty, and the best I could hope for are kindered minds that can appreciate a moment of...kindling?

Onto the more messy stuff...

Right now I'm in the middle of working on my apps for graduate school. After five years in the work force and making what I consider a reasonable salary to live comfortably with the occasional splurges (considerable savings not included) next to the Big Apple, I have finally decided to make the plunge and go back to school. It wasn't an easy choice, as I'm extremely adverse to change. The unknown instills a fear inside me that make me hang on to the status quo like a magnet. Fortunately I have time and youth on my side, but now that my time and quite frankly, my youth, has run out, I've finally kicked into full gear and have cranked out the first draft of my personal statement.

This decision has really inspired the title of my blog. I've accepted the fact that I will be making a career change. Into a field where the search for knowledge and truth is far more meaningful and rampant than the aspirations to lead and "leverage synergies"! Take what you will from that previous statement - but I know I'm mentally done with my old world and am eager to move onto the next. I know I will be giving up the comforts of my current life, but I'm willing to do it for something more personally meaningful.

Give me courage strength persistence and that little bit of luck that I have always found myself to have - and carry on! Keep Calm, and Carry On! Yes I would love to go to school in London - so let's see where this journey leads me.